any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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