How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
nutella sex= disaster
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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