I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
