Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Randomize
