I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
