walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
