May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize