its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
