well I can't set my house on fire every night
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
