I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
