thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
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Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
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You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?