my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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