and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Randomize
