just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
