from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
