super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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