I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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