try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby