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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.

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• (650): View more from California

  im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."

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  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (660): View more from Missouri

  I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table

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• (360): View more from Washington

  that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...

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  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  it's like his dick is making a u-turn.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.

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• (310): View more from California

  Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on

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