Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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