I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize