dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
