I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
