Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
