apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
