Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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