I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
