Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize