She went from zero to smokin in five shots
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
