I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Randomize
