ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
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Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
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Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize