there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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