Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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