And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
