i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
