if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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