So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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