i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
whose parrot is this?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo