If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
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