Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Will exercising make me less horny?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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