guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She even gives head with a lisp.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize