a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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