i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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