the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
