Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
