Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
as a side note pls kill me
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
