if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize