Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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