I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
