dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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