so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize