my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize